So last weekend marked the shitshow celebration in St. John’s otherwise known as Mardi Gras…or Halloween. It’s my favourite time of year, and typically I spend a great deal of time putting together a costume. This year I went as Firefox, which I thought I did a pretty sweet job with, but hardly anybody at the party I attended paid heed.

Firefox

Except for one guy, dressed as a Topgun character. I don’t know Topgun, but everyone else was happy to see him.

Anyway, he was really excited about my costume, and we started chatting for awhile. We had a great conversation, and then he left to grab a beer. I lost him in the suffocating crowd, joined my friends, and started double-fisting booze like there was a shortage.

Later, I ran into him in the throng of peopled decked out in every costume imaginable…including louffas, and one group dressed as a BLT with all the trimmings.

So we remained glued together for the remainder of the evening. Someone else took my camera and snapped a million photos, and I actually don’t remember talking to my friends much after that point. Then someone told me we were having an after-party at my place, so I invited Topgun back too.

Turns out there were more like four people at my after party. We joined them, had a seat on the futon, and then the nausea hit me.

I haven’t been sick since last year’s monumental wine fest, and I’ve been proud of this feat. I drink a lot of beer and I usually handle it well, but oh man, not that night. For some reason the beer came back with a vengeance, and I bolted to the bathroom nearby to unload everything in my stomach.

I’m not a quiet puker. You know those people who retch violently? That’s me, I hold nothing back. I’m practically screaming. He’s about 10 feet away from me, on the other side of a door.

Upon emerging, poor Topgun looked devastated. Like I had stolen his innocence. When he recovered, he was surprisingly nice about the whole thing, took my phone number, and I went upstairs to crash, expecting never to hear from him again. Suave, Candice. Suave.

But imagine my surprise the next morning when on my drive home to Bay d’Espoir, I receive a Facebook Friend Request from him. Then a text message. Then here I am two days later with a date for Saturday night, and I’m more confused than I ever was.

Should I have deployed this tactic all along? Should I have been playing the poor, defenceless victim to Alcohol? Time will tell, I guess.


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13 Responses

  1. maggie says:

    please, please, PLEASE do not attempt to reenact that pick up… if you start puking on the regular, I might have to defriend you ;)

    still rotted I missed that party… am unimpressed your costume did not have more of an impact ;P

  2. linlah says:

    My bestie from college married the guy she pucked in front of. You never know.

  3. Bay_Girl says:

    Awesome post. Thanks for the laugh ;)

  4. nashe says:

    We’re gonna need some developmental stories after this.

  5. Hey, it worked once — you may want to try puking again on Saturday!

  6. J says:

    As long as he doesn’t have a weird fetish, I’m super psyched for you!

    In America, it’s pretty weird to hear that someone doesn’t know anything about Top Gun…it’s kind of like a right of passage. Most women will remember that before they were fat and crazy, Tom Cruise and Val Kilmer were actually smokin’ hot.

    GIVE US DEETS ON THE DATE!

  7. Hevs says:

    so asking a guy to pick your scabs doesn’t work but puking in front of them does ? interesting…

  8. Amazing! It always happens when you would never ever expect it. Wicked costume btw! =)

  9. Taylor says:

    Firefox? Cleverest costume I’ve heard of this year.

  10. Alexandra says:

    I agree with Taylor – your costume rocks(ed)!
    And frankly I don’t think guys generally fall for chicks who regurgitate near them, your Topgun guy seems genuinely nice. Hope your date goes well…

  11. Kate says:

    If a guy can handle puke, you know he’s a keeper!

  12. Great costume. And don’t sweat what happened. Sometimes you bat your eyes and sometimes you vomit. Both actions can produce the possibility of a relationship. LOL.

    But in all seriousness – and some people may not like this advice – although I sometimes drink, I have always abided by the theory of never dating anyone that I met while wasted. It never works. Sorry.

  13. admin says:

    Bahaha, thank you!

    CC: I agree, totally.

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